[Textbook & Exercises]How to Sound Polite and Less Direct in English

How to Sound Polite 

and Less Direct in English

Objective:

Students will learn and practice strategies to make their language more polite and less direct, especially in professional and social settings.

Lesson Outline

1. Introduction to Politeness

• Key Idea: Being polite is highly valued, especially in British culture.
• Example: Compare these sentences:
  • "No, I’m not coming to your party this evening."
  • "I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it to your party this evening."
  • Ask students: Which sounds more polite?

2. Softening Requests

• Explanation: Requests can be softened by using past forms, continuous forms, or negative questions.
• Examples:
  • Direct: "Pick me up on your way to the party this evening."
  • Polite: "I was hoping you could give me a lift to the party."
  • Polite with negative tag: "You couldn’t give me a lift later, could you?"
  • Polite with tentative language: "I don’t suppose you could pick me up tonight, could you?"
• Activity: Students rewrite direct requests to make them more polite.

3. Softening Opinions

• Explanation: Use softer verbs and vague expressions to make opinions less direct.
• Examples:
  • Direct: "You’re too young to get married!"
  • Polite: "I reckon you’re a little young to be getting married."
  • Even softer: "Aren’t you kind of young to be getting married?"
• Techniques:
  • Use verbs: reckon, guess, feel.
  • Add vague expressions: sort of, kind of, a little bit.
  • Turn statements into questions.
• Activity: Students soften given opinions using these techniques.

4. Introducing Problems

• Explanation: Use verbs like seem and appear to soften statements when pointing out problems.
• Examples:
  • Direct: "You’ve made a mistake in this report."
  • Polite: "You seem to have made a mistake here."
  • Personal problem: "I seem to have lost those reports you wanted."
• Activity: Role-play where students practice pointing out mistakes politely.

5. Refusing Invitations Politely

• Explanation: Use tentative language to soften refusals.
• Examples:
  • Direct: "No, I’m not coming to your party this evening."
  • Polite: "I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it to your party this evening."
  • Polite alternative: "It’s looking unlikely I’ll be able to come this evening."
• Activity: Students practice politely declining invitations in pairs.

6. Practice Activities

Activity 1: Rewrite Sentences

• Students rewrite direct sentences to make them more polite.
  • Example: "Give me your book." → "I was wondering if you could lend me your book."

Activity 2: Role-Playing Conversations

• In pairs, students practice polite language in common scenarios:
  • Making requests.
  • Giving opinions.
  • Pointing out mistakes.
  • Refusing invitations.

Activity 3: Group Discussion

• Discuss cultural differences in politeness. How does politeness in English differ from students’ native languages?

7. Key Takeaways

1. Use past forms, continuous forms, or negative questions to soften requests.
2. Use verbs like "reckon," "guess," or "feel," along with vague expressions to soften opinions.
3. Use "seem" and "appear" to introduce problems politely.
4. Use tentative language to refuse invitations without sounding rude.

8. Homework

• Task: Write 5 polite sentences for each of the following scenarios in the comment tab of this lesson.:
  • Requesting help.
  • Sharing an opinion.
  • Pointing out a mistake.
  • Refusing an invitation.

9. Resources

• Visit BBC Learning English for more lessons on politeness and effective communication.

10. Final Note

Politeness is not just about grammar—it’s about understanding cultural norms and context. Practicing these techniques will help students navigate social and professional situations more effectively.